Before your teenagers drive you crazy, read this!Battlefield wisdom for stressed out parents.
Author: Nigel Latta
Harper Collins, 2008.
To be honest, I didn’t read this book from cover to cover – it wasn’t exactly what I call ‘holiday reading’!It was a good book to dip into, read a chapter, then chew it over for a while before returning to it.It was also a good conversation starter with the teen as they read a chapter then discussed the content…
Nigel Latta is a New Zealand family therapist working with families and teen from a variety of situations – the family courts to the family lounge.Don’t be put off by the list of principles, frameworks and plans.Nigel uses simple stories from families he has conversed with to make interesting reading.For some cases you’ll be able to say “Wow, I’m glad I’m not dealing with that… yet!!!”He incorporates practical solutions with real dilemmas.
Readers might need to ignore a bit of the vernacular.If you feel strongly about swearing you may be put off …read this! But try to understand that New Zealand culture is widely varied…
Latta provides sound counsel for parents who are confused, anxious or annoyed by their teen’s behaviour.He explains it is most often down to change: changing brain function, changing bodies, changing cultural dynamics.All can profoundly affect how our kids interpret the world and shape their identity within it.Throughout all the change, he encourages, parents can remain connected and in relationship.We can learn to understand why the changes are happening from a reality viewpoint, and step outside the need to respond out of fear or anger or desperation.There are some very practical tools to help parents practice reality.
The Battlefield wisdom for stressed out parents encourages parents (or anyone who has significant relationships with young people) to go easy on yourself and notice the “yellow splashes of sunshine” peeking through a stormy season.I’m not sure where your battlefield is with parenting – certainly it doesn’t have to be between you and your kids… but there is wisdom for those doing the hard yards and wading through mucky trenches only to find themselves still in no-mans land.
Nigel Latta’s book is readily available in local bookstores or public libraries.
